SATX

So as far as an update. I have moved. I have relocated to a land of rude customer service and drivers whom lack patience. I moved here to escape the oppression of the image of perfection. I needed a deep breath, a full exhale even. This move was to embrace my complete self beyond what I have always known was me. I needed to explore and be close to family.

However, that has not panned to be as I dreamed. This is a year in, and well I still have no close friends. I have intertwined myself to toxic ends to fill the void and wholelisticly make amends. I developed a new skill however. Running out of patience with all of human existence. Thee thought of sex makes my insides arrest. I can not. deal. Within this time of escape I’ve done nothing but become ensnared by snakes and those who more so portray hate. Engulfed by lies, deception, manipulation, fear, laziness, and lack. I, too, fell in the trap. So far the only thing I have achieved is being wild and hanging loose. I am confused. I thought once I received the freedom I sought for I would be, well, free. I would be released from a prison mindset, but that has not transpired yet. Although, let me give her her flowers. I have found a voice that will not bow to something that I feel I don’t deserve to rehearse. I know that I can speak up to multiples when people mismanage my humble soul. I can. do this.

What a beautiful thing.

I can also admit that I am more bold as I have always wished. To be bold to speak. So I am grateful. The misuse of my heart, mind, and body have birthed a mouth that is bold. Boldness.

Boldness-

1. willingness to take risks and act innovatively; confidence or courage. 2. the quality of having a strong, vivid, or clear appearance.

Oxford Languages

Yeah. I believe I can emotionally breathe, because I can verbally express.

What a beautiful thing.

For the past week, I am working on self, like really breakthrough for self. No like I bringing people in to hold me accountabile for self. No no like I am being more lenient, but presistent with self. I am enforcing keeping promises to self for…self. Self is embracking in a new level. I am working on crossing over to a new path. Soon I will be working toward releasing people from around my neck. Heck. I can feel myself close to cashing this check. The foundation for the life of my dreams is being set.

I will succeed at any thing I set as a priority.

Klassic Wilson, THEECEOQUEENN

When I glance into my future I see thee success. The feeling of my heart’s desire manifested within me. I feel is welling up even now. I can sense the great reveal.

What a beautiful thing.

So, despite the misperception of this new city I have found growth and meaning. Now because of the town, but because of who I innately am.

What a beautiful thing.